The Gardasil Vaccine and Sexual Health

An article caught my attention recently.  You may have seen the commercials for the Gardasil Vaccine lately.  Educating the public about the HPV virus is terrific, however there are some things the commercial doesn’t mention.  You should  make an informed decision about whether or not to pursue this route to achieve sexual health. I’ve included a link to the article and a few points from it below.

In today’s society, we want a quick fix for everything and the drug companies would have you believe that the Gardasil Vaccine will fulfill this for us. Since most of us probably have been exposed to HPV and very few will actually die as a result, I’d rather see them spend the millions and millions of dollars towards educating our youth on healthy sexual practices, self exams and PAP smears instead of injecting them.

So, what exactly is HPV?

The article by Brenda Eastwood, RNCP, shares this:
“HPV is a very common family of viruses found in both males and females.  The virus is found in and around the genitals. It is most often passed between two people through sexual activity, but this can also happen through other close skin to skin contact. About 3 out of every 4 people – males and females – who have had sex have been exposed to HPV… Only two of the 100 types of HPV can develop into cancer.  Other HPV types can cause ordinary and genital warts, but rarely cause cancer.”

What you won’t see “advertised” on the commercials is that only 1% of those infected will actually develop cervical cancer.  And, if caught early enough through regular pap smears, it can be successfully treated.  There are also several side effects that are not readily noted.  That’s why I encourage the education of young girls about their sexual practices and PAP smears, instead of immediately succumbing to the call of the commercials.

Brenda Eastwood, RNCP, is a Women’s Health Specialist with more than 25 years experience working with thousands of women.  Her goal, like mine, is to empower women with information.

A copy of her article regarding the HPV vaccine can be found here but you need to scrool way down below her current newsletter:
http://www.brendaeastwood.com/mr-events.taf?_UserReference=858FFD1F208941044A0CAF40Passionately,

Kim Switnicki, ACC, ECPC
Sex Educator, Speaker, Intimacy Coach

Author of “G-Spot PlayGuide: 7 Simple Steps to G-Spot Heaven!”
Pick up your Free Report on Top 10 Ways to be a Sexier, more Confidant Woman
www.lionessforlovers.com/pages/sign-up-for-sexy-ezine.htm

Sex after 40

As we age, many women start to worry about the physical changes that occur as we are approaching menopause that can affect sex.  Some of the changes are negative, like the dryness that happens.  But there are also positive effects as well, so I thought that I would share those positive aspects of us getting older ;-)

Being a sex educator and intimacy coach, I hear from a lot of women in my practice, at speaking engagements, tradeshows, everywhere – how sex over 40 just gets better and better!

Yes, our vaginal walls thin and hormone levels get erratic so we get drier.  With lower estrogen levels our muscles start to droop so we develop more pelvic floor issues (see www.bladderfreedom.com for help with that!), but our body image, confidence, and ability to take charge of our own orgasms can greatly increase!

Quite often, we aren’t as worried about how we look in bed, we’re getting more comfortable in our skin and we have learned what turns us on.  We can communicate it more confidently to our partners and we don’t mind “doing it ourselves” so we guarantee our own orgasms when we want them.

As women, we have the power to create the sex-life of our dreams, so I encourage all of you to take any steps necessary to get more comfortable with your bodies, acknowledge your imperfections as perfect, and allow yourself to let down your walls and let vulnerability in. The possibility of more powerful intimate relationships is within your grasp.

Passionately,

Kim Switnicki, ACC, ECPC
Sex Educator, Speaker, Intimacy Coach

Author of “G-Spot PlayGuide: 7 Simple Steps to G-Spot Heaven!”
Pick up your Free Report on Top 10 Ways to be a Sexier, more Confidant Woman
www.lionessforlovers.com/pages/sign-up-for-sexy-ezine.htm

G-Spot with Partner and G-Spot Fluids

A client recently asked me about how to use her g-spot vibrator.  She has yet to find her g-spot with it and suspects that, maybe she just needs to relax a bit more since she doesn’t have any problem finding it with her hubby during intercourse.

She also inquired where the juices from a g-spot orgasm come from and, her juices from a g-spot orgasm sometimes  smell like urine.

When first experimenting with your g-spot, try doing it alone.  This will give you plenty of time to get used to the feeling and give you quality time to “train” your body to experience a g-spot orgasm. Keep in mind, however that not all women will experience an orgasm from g-spot stimulation. Sometimes it takes a combination of several factors for you to “let go” and have this type of orgasm.

Experiment with different positions.  Try using your vibrator when you’re on your tummy, or sit up on your knees and bend forward, then approach yourself from behind.  If you are experiencing an orgasm when having intercourse, try that position as well.

Regarding female ejaculation, the liquid comes out of the urethral opening (where we urinate out of), not the vagina. You should also note that you can’t urinate and orgasm at the same time. There is a bladder sphincter that shuts down the bladder when you orgasm. If you have lax urinary muscles, you may have a bit of urine enter into the ejaculate stream that can cause a slight urine smell, but typically the fluid is not urine, nor is it vaginal fluid. It usually has a musky scent and is much thinner than vaginal fluid. The g-spot is actually an area of the urethral sponge (which surrounds the urethral tube) that swells upon sexual arousal. There are people (myself included) who believe that the g-spot is actually just an extension of the complex clitoral system.

I suggest you relax, have fun and try not to put too much pressure on yourself about what type of orgasm to have. Any orgasm is a good one in my book! Also, many satisfactory sexual experiences can be had with no orgasm at all. And, embrace, or at least don’t worry about, the fluids that come out of you – it’s all part of the experience.

Passionately,

Kim Switnicki, ACC, ECPC
Sex Educator, Speaker, Intimacy Coach

Author of “G-Spot PlayGuide: 7 Simple Steps to G-Spot Heaven!”
Pick up your Free Report on Top 10 Ways to be a Sexier, more Confidant Woman www.lionessforlovers.com/pages/sign-up-for-sexy-ezine.htm

Healthy Sexual Choices Made by Confident Teenage Girls!

Recent research suggests that girls ages 12 – 13 who have strong self concept, have not tried smoking and are not overweight are less likely to have sexual intercourse by the age 14 or 15. On the other hand, young boys who have tried smoking, have a poor relationship with parents and live in a low-income household at the age of 12 – 13 are more likely to be having sexual intercourse by the age 14 – 15. It appears that young boys are influenced more by social factors while young girls are influenced by personal and individual factors, and are more likely to be in situations in which they feel pressured into having sex with older boys. Since the factors differ so greatly between boys and girls, it is imperative that each receives sexual education appropriate to their needs.

Unfortunately, some believe that appropriate sexual education consists of telling teens to wait until they are older before having sex, and to use condoms if they must do so sooner. But how motivating is it to hear “no?” The last time someone told you no, was there a part of you that felt like saying, “Who are you to tell me what I can and can’t do?” Studies have shown consistently that abstinence education does not work. It seems that we are seeing proof that instilling confidence in our youth will go a long way to helping them become positively sexually empowered to make the choices that will benefit them. Let the education begin!

Magic Pill for Him?

With just about every click of the remote, turn of the page or click of a mouse you can come across an advertisement for male enhancement drugs.  Now I know it seems as though that it’s every man’s dream to have a bigger penis, but the truth of the matter is that there really isn’t any pill that will actually add length (regardless of what the advertisements claim).

There are, however, weights that can be attached to the penis to essentially stretch it out – though before going to this “length” it should be noted that it will take away from the thickness of said penis.  There are also “penis pumps” that work with varying degrees of success but they usually just make it larger temporarily.  This is done by bringing blood flow to the area. Dr. Joel Kaplan has a system that, he states, will work to add both length and girth but you need to stick to his regimen quite fanatically and it takes a few months to notice but he swears it works.

Many men think that it’s every woman’s dream to have a man with a bigger (thicker or longer) penis, when in reality that’s not always the case.  In fact I hear from lots of women who want tips on how to handle a big penis because they find it too uncomfortable and tricky to ‘work’ with. The next time your man mentions an interest in a male enhancement drug – reassure him that his penis is just the way you want it.  Then you can come up with all sorts of ways to show him how much!

Reassurances from you can go a long way to easing his mind. Let him know that it is the other lovely and delicious things he does that make you wild with desire (such as whispering in your ear while he is inside of you, the way his kisses you or the way he rubs against your clitoris with his pubic bone, etc.)

I know a woman who was very satisfied with her lover’s 3 inch penis because it hit her g-spot perfectly! If you have a man who sets the mood, turns you on, engages in foreplay the way you like it and gets you into that lovely state where making love is all you want to do in that moment, then he could be a man with no penis at all and if he has a desire to please you – you will be very satisfied!

Passionately,

Kim Switnicki, ACC, ECPC
Sex Educator, Speaker, Intimacy Coach

Author of “G-Spot PlayGuide: 7 Simple Steps to G-Spot Heaven!”
Pick up your Free Report on Top 10 Ways to be a Sexier, more Confidant Woman www.lionessforlovers.com/pages/sign-up-for-sexy-ezine.htm

Pole Dancing

I saw a post on a social networking site that spoke negatively about Pole Dancing classes and how it feeds the exploitation of women. I felt compelled to comment so am also posting my reply here!

This topic is near and dear to me since I’m a sex and intimacy coach and my mission is to help women connect with their sensuality and achive their sexual potential – whatever that means for them. (AND I’m off to my pole dance class tonight!)

The owner of the studio where I take my classes has created a dance studio for women only with the express purpose of helping them to feel empowered. I offer workshops at the studio as it fits in with my passion of sexually empowering women.

It has been my experience, both personally and with clients, that connecting to your inner sensual self is IMPERATIVE if you want to be as successful in life AND in business as you possibly can. Our sexual energy is our life force or chi energy and keeps us vital and healthy and strong. It has even been proven that regular sexual activity with quality orgasms will help you live longer!

Confidence in one’s inner femaleness and feeling and being grounded in who we are as women is one of the most powerful things we can do to fully align with our purpose. We are female before we are mothers, daughters, co-workers, wives, teachers, etc. Fully connecting to our feminine power using such rituals as dance (being recorded far back in history) is tremendously affirming and empowering for many women who have been afraid or uncomfortable in their own skin.

Once we are truly comfortable with who we are as women, then we can stand tall, be more confident and grounded and we will emit a positive energy that men, women and children will be drawn to. We can watch as the law of attraction brings forth everything we need to then create the life we truly want and deserve to have.

I believe that pole dancing absolutely helps empower women. It’s purpose is not to connect with their inner slut (as had been suggested), though for some that may be exactly what they want or need, but to connect with their feminine power to be strong and vital like Mother earth, Mother Nature, Goddesses, etc. You can be the force that gives birth to your perfect life.

It will surely take a bit more than a few hours on the pole, but isn’t self and sexual empowerment an on-going journey with each step moving us forward to what we desire? For some women, this is a HUGE step and it can be tranforming for them and a shift can happen that PROPELS them forward. It can be truly amazing to be a witness to.

Again, these are my opinions and my intention is not to offend but merely to point out that it can be very empowering to connect with our sensual side indeed.

Let me know what you think!

Sex Ed. Works

A study just published in the Journal of Adolescent Health verifies what countless other studies and certainly informal experiences of us sex educators have found: that sex education in school encourages teenagers to put off having sexual intercourse!

Importantly, the boys said that they were more likely to use condoms the first time they had sex since receiving sex education.

Now girls from rural areas and female high school drop-outs were less likely to delay having sex. But it still reinforces that fact that the more we teach our youth about sexuality, the better prepared they will be to handle this powerful, emotionally charged and even life changing experience that is making love.

Sexy Monkey

I recently read how it is the female rhesus macaques (monkeys) rule their roost in the jungle. They have “highly regimented societies” where these queens lord it over their male counterparts. They keep the males around for mating and to offer a bit of protection but mainly the females are in absolute control. Scientists call the rhesus monkey the most successful primate after humans! I think I’ll be paying attention the next time I see a monkey special on TV – maybe I could learn something.

How to Talk to Your Children About Sex and Sexuality

I get asked this often. Why? Most of my clients’ children haven’t moved out. Granted, some of their children are in their thirties and it’s a safe bet they aren’t looking for sex advice from their parents, but you get the picture. Parents want to know how to avoid passing their own hang-ups or inhibitions (we’ve all got them!) onto their kids.

You can feel like you’ve run slam bang into a brick wall when your six year old asks about where babies really come from. How do you respond to your two year old frantically rubbing herself while in the bathtub urging you to try it because it feels so good? And the always tricky “What’s a blowjob?” that pops serenely from your angelic child’s mouth over Sunday dinner with your in-laws. I’m sure you have a few treasures just like these!

If sexuality was not talked about while you were growing up, you may find this a difficult subject to discuss. I commend you for reading this and having the curiosity to know how you can help your child develop a healthy, responsible attitude about something as fundamental as their sexuality.

Studies show that in families where talk about sex and sexuality is open, children tend to delay their experimentation. Some people feel it’s not a subject to teach children or is best left to schools, or worse, have the attitude if sex isn’t talked about, then kids won’t ever do it. I have some news for you. You’ve been giving them sex education their whole lives! The major way we learn is by modeling. Your child has learned a lot about sex from watching how you hug and kiss your partner each morning (or not), how aunt Jane is allowed to pinch your cheek or pat your bum when she comes over even if you don’t like it, how you hide or don’t hide your body when you come out of the shower, if the bathroom door is always open for Mom and not for Dad, if you refer to your genitals as private parts, woohoo and winky, vagina and penis, or they just aren’t mentioned. Do you see how a message can be given without a word passing your lips?

So how do I discuss sex with kids? My answer is threefold. The first thing you want to ensure is your bottom lip doesn’t drop to the floor as the colour drains from your face. Even if your child has the attention span of a gnat, they’re bound to pick up on that one. Try to keep calm and realize their intention is probably not to see who can freak you out the most (even if their friends are waiting around the corner giggling). If you want them to develop a healthy appreciation for their sexuality and not feel it’s a taboo subject, hear them out. Maybe try a light and casual “What do you mean exactly?” to find out a little more about what specifically they’re seeking. Find out if it’s a definition for a science quiz before you go on and on about your first oral sex experience! Then affirm it with “What a great question.”

Second, don’t lie. If you don’t know the answer (example – what does cunnilingus mean?), let them know you’ll find it and get back to them – and then do that! Alternatively, seek out the information together. Be cautious of doing a Google search online with your child present, as you even you may be shocked at the results that come back. There’s a fabulous service available free from the public library where you can ask a librarian any question and they will find the answer for you. How cool is that?

Finally, answer them in language that makes sense to them. There’s no reason to start sounding like a professor just because the topic is sex.

We’ve come a long way from “Don’t touch yourself – you’ll go to hell”, “You’ll grow hair on your palms” or my favourite “you’ll go blind”. Let’s leave the “Do NOT touch” sign in the china shop where it belongs.

For more please check out http://www.teachingsexualhealth.ca/ or www.sexualityandu.ca